Cookie Cutters And Fitting In
One of the things I gleaned from the editoral process this week is A — it sucks. And B — repeat.
No for real though. It’s a constant process of letting go and refocusing on that which you want.
I did this blog post ages ago (yesterday!) where I was talking about negative and positive spaces!
And how they carve out and compliment one another.
Now where was I going with this! Oh yes!
Fitting in!
That negative and positive space reminds me of the concept of fitting in!
When I was a kid we all heard the gingerbread story. Run, run, run as fast as you can, you can’t catch me! I’m the gingerbread man!
Anyway, I thought (as a child)…. Pulls you closer and whispers … he was real…For real!
And then I thought what an evil thing to do to burn a man in the oven! Humans!
So one day, I believe I asked my mum to drop me off early to school so I could go find him. She thought I was a keener but I wanted to get there early because I thought he was lost.
And so I went to the park and checked under the bridge that I would ask my friends to run over while I hid under to see if I could get him. The duty teachers and I knew each other on a first name basis! ;) Love you Mrs Gilmore if you’re reading this! You were my favourite! And Mrs Bradasse – you were tough. But tough love.
I also ran by the trees that I played in! Even the park where I fell down and got the wind knocked out of me and temporarly lost consciousness!
The struggle was real kids! See that kid falling off, that was me! You all have it nice now!
But I digress.
Where was I. Oh!
Because the teacher encouraged us that he was lost and running around somewhere! We all looked for him. Until one day. She said she found him!
Hooray! I thought! He has been found!
And now can you tell how thoroughly dissapointed I was when I saw him in the oven. Burnt.
He was delicous though. Buttons and all.
Now where was I!
Well I find that my musings today is on space and fitting in.
Because as I approach the end of my first book: Immaru — Rebirth.
I am reminded by one chapter my editors were like: Pam. It just doesn’t fit!
Like we can’t fit it in here. It’s too abstract.
And I mused over this and deleted it out and put it back in again.
And then I thought of all the other authors with rejection letters after rejection letters. The Star Wars stories of not fitting in but you do it anyway. The ones who created new genres and were leaders in their thought field!
Because you know what..I really liked it!
And my friends loved it and supported it!
And they said: Pam — stop trying to fit in with the rest of the world! It’s so unique you just have to include it! Be different — or think different as the Apple slogan goes!
And my friends here at writing were just saying: you just need to pitch it to people looking for it!
And so: Here I Am!
One last musing today.
My current Pam told my two years ago Pam who wrote the book: You did good. With all the resources you were given at that time and you went and put yourself out there in supportive environments out of your comfort zone. You did real good kid. Keep going.
Because I thought, well. I write significantly better now. My writing has evolved and changed so much because I practice almost everyday.
Now, I see my work/art as a collection or documentation of my growth.
Evolution — Love in growth.
And that’s how I pep talk myself up again.
Happy WINDSDAY!
I learned to dance in the rain again! Feels good.
